http://dearoldlove.tumblr.com/page/3

It sucks its been a year and I still wrote this. Just when you think over over some0ne- you look under your bed and find "stuff"

Only Wanna Be Cuffed By You

I have the riding crop and handcuffs you gave me before you dumped me. What do I do with them? I don’t want to be smacked or cuffed by anyone else.

you can ride away to NY- or into the darkness- but there you still are. 

this is for RAYMOND

hi raymond!!! here it is- i am back. he who tirelessly checked this blog day in and day out-for months- sometimes 5-6 times a day for new posting on my exciting, amazing and death defying life.. only to be needlessly disappointed with nothing new to read.. well raymond- this is for you. you know why i took a hiatus. and now you know why i am back.

i am bored. 

again.

3 BIG BOYS in a little STUDIO

I think I have had more visitors to my little studio in NYC than I had in my apartment in SF in a year.  Though the city has a million things to do and places to go- it seems everyone is kind of tired some days and need a place to hang out without blaring music, the hustle of the crowds or the expectation that one must SHELL OUT $150 upon merely leaving the house.....The boys came to go to a big gay black ball (sounds as bad as I think it was) and somehow I pictured a fancy tuxedo occasion, formal and nice. Upon meeting up with them- it was revealed by "black" they mostly meant leather chaps, gloves and motorcycle vests- with nothing else on. HAve I NOT learned??? Not much was said about the even which only leads me to believe I DO NOT WANT TO KnoW MORE ABOUT THE EVENT- and we left it at that and ate ribs. I left SF- please do not bring it back to my apartment in n.y. I did not move to Chelsea either. thank ye, oh loyal subjects if the bare ass chap tribe. Though I love thee so...

Ms THANG update...

HOWDY HO FOLKS

I attribute- or possibly might use the word "BLAME" my new obsession of deer on my Dad and his Texas influence with the Texas Wildlife magazine. The other awesome obsession is bone marrow- Kara and i had a couple hoofs when I was in Austin- and its jut so ... YUM. Its also , hands down, completely and totally disgusting when you get right down to it, and you definitely reach a point of saturation where you just get a sick feeling that it just aint right to be scrapin' the greasy insides of a cow leg out ... But until then its you think you've arrived at cow heaven.  

Tracy gave me these awesome stags head salt and pepper shakers, and it really got me thinkin... how can incoprorate DEER into my EVERYDAY LIFE HERE IN THE BIG APPLE??  Well, add one ex tattoo boyfriend and a really good idea- and folks you have it- I am the proud owner of my own deer - I call him LEON- to have and hold until I am old and wrinkly- or at least until the sun blasts it out so far that it is only recognizable as an old Calvin pissing on Hobbes tattoo- or something of the like. 
This could, in all likelihood- be misinterpreted by some as my  continuing quest to look like a lezbian,  and I have moments- such as the one with Danica and a friend's baby, where I all and out look like I have birthed a child with my lover and we have taken a portrait to send on teh next Christmas card update, explaining who the donor was, or what adoption agency blessed us with our "little miracle". Folks, this just aint true. Until I have unEarthed the every last dysfunctional man on the planet, tried my darndest to date him and gone down in a ball of addicted, self loathing flames, I will not e dating any women. Unless I find one with a penis. In which case, I hope she has severe issues from childhood. 


I held the first annual "She's Crafty" party in the attic- and it was a moderate success. Its no easy feat balancing art projects with bowls of chili and huge glasses of mulled wine up the stairs.. Whats worse is AFTER Drinking the mulled wine- trying to get back DOWN the stairs with a newly created project of STD glass identifiers. I am pretty sure there is a bad painting of a lemer I attempted still up there. I hope the tenants are enjoying that gem. And i expect at least a 50% profit upon the sale of it when I become *famous...*
Mr Shane visited form Colorado and we really really attempted to be cultural. We headed to The MEt and possibly did the fastest tour in history of the entire museum. It was a lot to take in, but this was one of many attempts to get a picture of us in front of a naked penis. I mean- Ya gotta keep it fresh. Unfortunately, I was all to aware of the prison , I mean museum guard and kept snapping them off center. Dammit. I mean what do I have to show form my cultural awakening with no nudie shots?? 

Moving to NYC might have been just the thing a middle aged unemployed broken hearted jaded cynic needs. Or not. Actually- its nice to experience the bitter cold on your face- makes you know that you are alive- and that maybe you had grown more *pussy* like than you had expected out in California. It is an odd existence of small apartments and constant searches for bars or restaraunts that serve your whim of the moment- but  its a welcome change form the cuddle parties and polygamy meetings in my old neighborhood. The best is seeing old and I MEAN OLD SCHOOL friends form colorado that haven't changed much- and have changed a lot- and still remind you that life is good- people are good despite the sh*t behavior some displayed during the Bush administration.  Although going to a laundry mat sucks eggs- no matter how you hard boil it.

CRABS AREN'T BAD

people are really drawn to this t-shirt. I do not know why. Its either a cruel joke i am unassumingly playing on myself everyday that folks are actually kind of mocking me by saying "CRABS! AWESOME!" and pointing or that they genuinely have an affinity for the little buggers. 

total girl crush

I always moderately liked The Breeders- they were good enough and any offshoot of Pixies was just one degree closer for me to be to the REAL DEAL.. BUt this SHOW ROCKED. It really did. I lost myself in it and just screamed the lyrics like a Clay Akin fan at his Idol reunion show. Made me go home and practice my guitar chords the next day. Unfortunately, that lasted exactly that=- one day. 

Jenni and Matt have that kind of weird relationship where when he strangles her you think " oh, isn't that cute??" As we have come to believe that any attention- albeit negative - from MAtt is good attention- and he might just be that much closer to saying " I LUV U Jenni" via text at 4 am from the PIzza joint in 6 short months. If we're lucky!!! 
JZ, Jarm and me headed to Santa Cruz JUST CUZ... one fine day and ended up at an all ages rock-a-illy show and a $69 hotel room on the "bad side of town" SO, for Santa Cruz, that meant an ocean view- and a fellow in the parking lot that offered to get us high for a 7-11 donut. It was fun- and weird things always seem to pass when we 3 are together- I talked to some boys who toured wit the band ( ie stalkers who follow them) and they sai dthey were 18. I did some quick calculations, and people, I am no Mathmetician. But I realized I WAs DOUBLE- yes DOUBLE THEIR AGE!! Rock on.....

She don't need no King

Howe slays me. Me and a room full of 50 year old men last night. 

I don't want another fish. I don't even want to look at the sea.

Dr. Suesssenhausen

its starting to seem like groundhog day for me in SF. Every year the same events happen, the city goes apeshit everytime,  and I find myself writing about them since its been a cycle ongoing. The 3 boys came for Folsom street fair again- and invaded my house. This is the disaster area they stayed in-apparently the rumor that gay men are clean is a misnomer... and I had to arrange a cab and alarm for their 7 am flight back monday to portland- since none of them could see straight at 3 am Sunday night. I didn't go this year -the pee tasting scene and fisting booth was more than enough to last me a lifetime last year-but we had a lovely Saturday in Sausalito where we introduced Carsten to Dr Suess at the art gallery for the first time. He said he now understands why Americans are so simple if this was how we all learned to read...

he has a point...of course he was walking around in laiderhousen at The Bank of America in my neighborhood and I am sure a few Americans might have something to say about the Germans as well. Can't we all just get along?

mamamamamammyyyyyyyyy vagina

Anthony came to town and his record label's band from portland played- and half of Pdx was there it seemed. You could just smell the hipness. They actually were way better than I thought they were and it was fun to do something in a different venue-which was a coffee house packed to the rim. which actually might be why it reminded me of "that place." seemed liked being in the rainy state that night just from the vibe. interesting. I guess these are the new hip bumper stickers as well. and its arguable if he should have this on his car. 

for many reasons. 

and I am not sure liz should be making this "V" with her fingers near it either.

He Barocked it

They sold out The Roxie theater for a BYOB screening of the debates Friday. It was awesome. I mean awesome.  We took up 2 drunk rows- and aside from Bess we all loved the heckling - and it got louder the worse McCain was and the drunker everyone got. I say aside from Bess becasue while we all did generally  want to listen-she was probably the only one that had to sit at dinner on Sunday with a Pulitzer Prize winning author ( her Dad THE AMAZING KENNEDY)  on American History and answer questions regarding the nuances between the answers. 

I think he would love my version of watching which was to laugh out loud every time McCain said "package."

These days I wake up early for no apparent reason and just stare at the wall. I have never been a morning person- and really I should jump up and go to work- but instead- I stare. This morning I started wandeirng around my house and noticing the things like the light through the sunflowers on my table- and the miniature dog and donkey that my dad sent- as another reminder of my roots, and what could await me if I would just give up the city life- and what I will inheirate upon his demise. . I put my camera on MACRo and fotographed my kitchen- its a pretty good macro- if I dont say so- and well, probably better than the staring. Even If I still didn't make it to work til 11:30.

I like how they are both smiling- the dog may have kind of alterior motive with his grin- but the donkey is definatley just your average miniature happy donky. And yes, the answer is yes. Please don't call and ask. Yes. I HAVE lost my mind.

now this REALLY makes me laugh out loud- "THIS CAN"T BE REAL"

Here's just a few quotes from Claymates (Clay Aiken fan group) who aren't waving rainbow flags this morning:

"This is a gut wrenching day for The ClayNation. Somebody wake me up, I hope its a dream."

"please tell me I'm not the only one who is shocked beyond belief! I feel numb I'm so upset. This can't be real!! How can you guys say this won't change anything? This changes EVERYTHING. I don't even know what to think right now"

"I hope he gets some peace of mind now BUT I feel he lied to everyone-especially us fans. I feel like we were "used". I also feel he has now become like a Michael Jackson and it's a bit too weird! He isn't just the plain ordinary person with the values he first stood for."

"To me this is the saddest thing and the reason I won't be able to hold him as my idol. I remember the day when I ran to turn it on and called all the family to watch with pride. It just seems so in your face now and I don't want exposing my kids to this. "

"I just feel rather silly now having spent the last 5 years drooling over and being fan girly for a singer I thought was straight and now finding out he is gay. We always called him our boyfriend and that won't be happening anymore."

this makes me laugh out loud

Mac ook Pro

I have gone to the dark side - that is I purchased a macbook pro... and will never go back I am sure. Unfortunately - it hasnt improved my typing skills one bit- and i am finding the"B" key especially hard to punch for some reason- leaving all my stories about biyatches, brides and glass bottom boats even more confusing. I can say a few people have claimed they are now fluent in "carey type" so I feel I am encouraging the use of the left side of most people's brains that I instant chat with. which only adds to the general well being of mankind. Like how the makers of Viagra must feel.

It only took me losing my MIND after dealing with craiglist freaks ( i.e. liars? cheats? scammers?) for a few weeks to achieve this small victory of owning my shiny silver new 4GB 2..6 GHZ 250 gb 512 MB honey. Don't be impressed- I only know this stuff after bugging every computer geek I know for a month -and I won't know what they mean tomorrow. but i DO know I got a decent deal from a rich kid in Marin whose parents bought him the thing for school- he dropped out- never opened it and wanted the cash. LIttle shit.

This happened ONLY after stalking a girl who claimed she bought an even better model on E-bay and was awaiting its arrival to buy from her. After missing the stellar deal at Apple for a free i-touch- she reported back to me she had been sent a box with newspapers and plastic plates in it. I would have been pissed handing over $2700 for some plates. even though I could use some. NOt to mention I had 2 people over that work at Apple that reminded me they could've gotten me 25% off. dum dum dum. I mean DUMB. With a "b."

The whole thing was sketchy - and I think made me nervous because friday when I went out to my car - I realized I had carried the tv remote with me all the way to the street. I also left the oven on for 12 hours after baking a gluten free cake. AT least if I had burned the house down I could have still turned the tv on. I may just be trying to do too much to forget the fact that I feel like a girl dressed up in tafita for prom left at her house whose date didn't show up, and my job makes me feel like a dolphin jumping hoops for fish bits at Seaworld- and trying to take 10 units at film school and keep jumping through said hoops while whistling Dixie us just too much for anyone to do??

but is it weird instead of the 35 poeple I had at my house friday night I wanted to just be in bed snuggling with my new MB Pro and editing Gunsmoke which is due tomorrow?? Not after what I went through to win this *a#y over. I mean BaBy.

I have got to move out of this town.

I just got these e-mails today that had the subject lines;

Looking for fire torch wicking for Poi show‏.

SHAMANISM: The Hidden Realm.

Spiritual Development through Out-of-Body Experiences!‏

Tribal Fusion Bellydance NOW in Fairfax!‏

All Men Are Sexual Healers Home Course Released!‏

how to piss me off

sit in your '91 Honda Accord opposite me at a red light. without your signal on. when the light turns green punch yer little car's gas as fast as it will go into the intersection to turn left RIGHT IN FRONT OF A 900cc MOTORCYCLE thinking you will beat me- forcing me to brake in an intersection almost running into your stupid windshield or having me fly off my bike over the front. either way you are an idiot. I'm not asking for a cushipon pad made of flower petals and ice cream on every corner- but please don't put my precious head at risk any more than it is because you can't afford the 2009 lamborghini you want so you try to prove your manhood in other ways....

caught in a frenzy

this is pretty funny in itself. total disgust.

but here is what we were watching. the lady lives in Russia- there aint no SPCA and stuff there. you could probably eat them if you wanted to and no one would say a word.

we really are too uptight here in the U.S.

ba-dunk this

my co-worker just came over and said "damn! I just noticed ____ has a serious ba-dunk-a-dunk! you ever notice that? damn!"
we have been working with ____ for over 8 months now- and yes, I have noticed her ba-dunk. a. dunk.
its huge. but its not that its huge- its that she 's all mary kate up top- like straight out of a j crew catalog- then all shaniqua in back. its pretty strange. but hey- someone could easliy find me curled up underneath my desk one of these days = and well- its ok to have an ass the size of Germany at work- its NOT ok to be so tired you find solace in the warmth of your floor space covered in computer cables.
and my budaunk aint so tiny its own damn self.

make it right

Sofia

i was seriously worried when Steve posted this picture of his baby- she had a little goatee and a really really awful alien look about her- but seriously- she is shaping up to be just a precious little adorable creature. So, I am advising Steve to go get a paternity test immediately.

jesus how many people had sex in January?

Its Jeni, regina and Kassia's birthday this weekend- and JZ' is next friday. Seriously- thats 9 people in a 3 week span. I guess I DO LIKE VIRGOS...bastards. I read all about the aluminum deodorant health thing and decided to try not wearing any last night- and after Sean took a picture of me that revealed HUGE SWEATY ARMPITS I guess I'll just go ahead and go with the alzheimer's...

Ed did a taste test later on because Jarmilka is usually the stinky hippie of the bunch - not me- but I was neck and neck with her. gross. And she is European- so she has an excuse. I was trying to not be a total kook when I get older- but whatever. stinky now-or crazy later. Some would argue I'm crazy now- so why not roll with it...

Jeni's B- day party was a block from Don and Syrus' Ukelaleu show - so it worked out nicely to stumble by both- and proceed to stink up 2 venues at once. I made fun of Greg's drum machine to no end- but it really did add some awesome sound effects to " I don't want to do your dirty work- oh yeah" even if it was half a square foot and he sits in a chair and pecks at it like chicken typing.

obin Williams had a last minute secret show on Tuesday and it was so amazing. He is fucking brilliant. I was trying to re-enact his pornography video on Fast Forward - and I guess it made me sweat even more.

don dmc!

It was Don Steele's Birthday- and I had no idea I knew so many Virgos... but unfortunately it was on a week night- and as 4 am started to roll around and I found myself groping Don up against a wall while he was wearing a full leather black zip up uniform that kind of made him look like run DMC with his adidas on- I knew it was time to go. Only Right after the rindition if NEW YORK NEEWWWW YOOOOORK! we did.

Pipers tattoo

Accident? I think NOT.

Imagine big SHOES!

Jarmilka wanted to go see Modeselektor for her birthday, and I swear, no matter how many times I read it or hear it- every time- I SAY it- I say it wrong. Its just like the word hyperbole. Everytime I say HYPER-BOWL. Good thing I have no use for that word whatsoever in my vocabulary. Although I use them everyday.

hyperbole: The difference is a hyperbole is an exaggeration. For example: His feet were as big as a barge. It looks like a simile. It is comparing foot size to the size of a barge. Everyone knows that a barge is approximately 700 feet long. Imagine getting a pair of shoes that big!

EXAMPLE:

Jarmilks turned like 12 years old. Imagine! Only being 12 years old and delaing with Don Steele!

Her party ended up being a darn good time- and unfortunately I left my camera on the table for far too long and ended up with shots such as these

I particularly like the shot of JZ next to the lezbian smut cd- THAT SHE CLAIMS SHE FOUND IN HER BACK YARD....yeah. see what living in SF too long can do to a perfectly nice girl from Long Island?

Syrus, who I am pretty sure is responsible for these shots- including this self portarit and the one of my crotch in particular-(Lorenzo is his name but I FINALLY I got everyone to call him Syrus the Virus all day) must have enjoyed ONE of only 2 cupcakes - all alone because it was all over his beard- which no one wanted after that. I baked Quiches - yes I BAKED QUICHES and I didnt eat them. or even try them. But I hear they were actually good- and the secret ingredient was TEARS . Indeed TEARS. I was blasting Ratatat while baking in preparation for the show last night (which was so F*CKING moving I can't even begin to explain) but although the recipe didn't call for salt- it obviously needed some. Made with love and heart and emotion. damn emotions.

I didn't even mind feeling a ton at The Fillmore while rocking with the hot overpacked crowd. MAn I just love it when I love it. so much without saying a word with those ratataters.

Makes me wanna shut up. Kind of.

yum! squirrel

My dad likes to remind me of my Texas roots in various ways. 1. by calling me at 6 am in the morning and telling me he has been up for hours tending cattle. Like I should be. or at least be at whole foods by now buying organic something 2. telling me not to "get too fancy upthar in that loud city" and 3. by renewing my subscription to Texas Outdoor every year. This magazine is a seriously bizarre compilation of tips on how to appreciate wildlife, preserve natural beauty and animals AND THEN BLAST THE SH*T OUT OF THEM! My Dad is a perfect combination of this as he is totally humane and loves animals- but also kills them for a living. Which you have to do if you own a cattle ranch. The killing part- not the humane part.

I was reading it in bed on Sunday becauseI cannot bring myself to read another word of "Eat Pray Love no matter how many F**king specials Oprah has on it, AND it had the 2008 HUNTING forecast I have been so eagerly awaiting. To my itter disbeleief and sheer JOY- I found a nice little section on SMALL ANIMALS TO KILL. TO introduce CHILDREN to hunting! That is..... SQUIRRELS. Now- here is where my Texas pride kind of becomes - well, embarrassing. I am not really sure what you do with a squirrel after you "GIT 'EM"- but I am afraid the answer might have something to do with adding salt and pepper to taste.

not that nice that not nice

Its super nice to have someone come over and bring you soup and check on you in your time of need. Its super A- holey to take fotos of your time of need. although i've been known to do the same. :)

I was determined to kick the ass of whatever was making me sick- it was just too nice out to be sweating in bed. I wante dto be sweating somewhere else. But upon arriving- with the soup- Jen found it HILARIOUS to take sick fotos of me. ha. defenseless. but I did kick the crap out of that bug. gallons of water- emergen-c every 3 hours and super green food. whose queen> eh> eh>????

Oh, Nooooooo YOU DID- INT!!!

"Today was one of those days when the Universe wraps itself around my head and humps my skull just to show its dominance." I woke up and was pretty sure the entire East coast's germs had landed in my ears and head. A few people at the wedding were sick- and I was coughed on by all of them- and I remember the exact moments-thinking," well, I hope that bug didnt somehow get into my mouth even though I'm a foot away from them." But it did -that and no sleep for a week did it- not to mention the pair of 400 lb. Chicago mafia sisters that took up 3 seats between the 2 of them that TALKED (YELLED) the entire flight back about their niece who was "so unfairly arrested in Oakland for beating up a man" well into the night not allowing anyone to sleep the entire trip. Even with earplugs shoved in my already stuffed ears. I think I heard "Fo-ged aboudit" like 20 times.

Also, upon returning home- I realized I had sublet my apartment to CHEWBACCA. BLACK CHEWBACCA. BLACK CHEWBACCA IN the summertime SHEDDING. The bathrooms were full of long hairs in one and short hairs in the other- the likes of which I have never seen. NO HUMAN could possibly have shed that much hair in 10 days. They also were apparently not aware of the ONE GOLDEN RULE in my house. NO CILANTRO. DUH. You see, sometimes when I sublet I come back to flowers, a shockingly super clean apartment and even a weeks worth of awesome groceries they couldn't finish. Its like Christmas with a Santa Clause that has no list of what I might like. But no- in addition to the ewok or grrrrrrrrranimals that stayed here- they also appeared to be CILANTRO LOVERS- because the ONLY thing I found in my refrigerator was this. I mean Its like a pound of it- and its the ONLY thing in there. What does someone even DO with a pound of that stuff? this is further evidence that it was probably an herbivore with fur staying here. How did they know? how'd they guess? I guess I didn't leave a print out of

http://www.ihatecilantro.com/ visible for them.

They also left these coasters. Which are just weird. and ugly. and who travels with ceramic coasters to a rental house? Furry cilantro eating sweaty glass drinkers, that's who. I need to be more specific in my rental ads.

ITS 90 DEGREES IN SF TODAY- YUP- RIGHT ON SCHEDULE-SEPTEMBER- LET SUMMER BEGIN!

Half of Sivans wedding party is still in N Carolina

"It now appears Hanna will be a Category 1 hurricane when it hits the North Carolina coast early Saturday morning, Since the exact path is uncertain, everyone who lives in the coastal counties needs to be ready." Gov. Mark Sanford urged the voluntary evacuation of two northeast counties, as the storm approached.
"The suggestion is for people to look at this storm and make their own decisions," he said.

I find it incredibly strange someone would tell the general public - AND LETS BE HONEST- MAYBE NOT THE SHARPEST TACKS IN THE SACK- to just take a gander at the storm once you can see it and decide THEN if its time to run away?? I dunno.

mayor of the second biggest city in Alaska

If one more person gets married I'm gonna...

go and be happy for them I guess... Nicole is another person that looks exactly the same as she did in 9th grade. see her there in the front?? spitting image- no?
the fotos all look like some backdrop at a photography studio your parents made you go to in 4th gradeto get that "perfect family" shot-while you fought the whole way there and back smiling only when the flash went off- because your mom bribed you with the McDonald's you were promised once a year if you were good. but in this case its real. Telluride Colorado really DOES look like this.
Nicole asked me to go raft the GRand Canyon which is an amazing offer- but after nearly drowning rafting and also drowning in tears I didn't think I was in the right mental space. They are somewhere near Phantom Ranch today- probbaly not where I belong at the moment.

I was quite the joiner last month- sheesh. these classes and working are killing me- but I swear- If I can NOT be a lawyer by next year I would be thrilled. and not wish bad things to all my friends who are getting married and pregnant. I promise.
ok just a little a little.

LAINIE's a NEW YORKER!

I met up with Lainie for breakfast at "the Meat" whose only regret about moving to NY last year was that she didn't get out of that "god forbidden boring fog town SF sooner" and proceeded to eat raw oysters and champagne, with a croque madame and then headed out to drink red wine in the baking sun at Brass Monkeys' rooftop, only to be followed by spiced pina coladas at the rusty knot. I really coudln't figure out why i felt like puking a couple hours later on Scott's couch- until I recapped what was actually sitting in my gut.

LESSON: You CAN have it all in Manhattan- but you really shouldn't.

At least not all at once....

Deep Virginia

I hitched a ride to the Norfolk airport with Jason and really thought he was joking when he said we were going to stop off at the MONSTER TRUCK BUILDING SIGHT. He was not joking in the least.

I guess I should have known- I mean what else does Virginia have but monster trucks and endless crab cakes?? Oh yeah, all the guests that go on Jerry Springer.

Also, at JFK- there is an iPod vending machine. I thought this was really problematic- as I have more than once- punched in A-8 for Cool Ranch Doritos only to accidentally get Red Hot Fire Cheetos- the likes of which no one would actually want. And really, I just can't imagine making that kind of mistake with a $399 purchase and say, ending up with an iPod shuffle- also something no one really wants.

Duck, North Carolina or Sivan got mawwied

Sivan really tested the will of all of us as her wedding was at the far reaches of NC- on a tiny little peninsula in the Outer Banks. It was worth getting to- amazing is really how you describe it. ALL the houses were literally planatation mansions- where I am pretty sure no one that owns one actually lifts a finger or knows what a broom looks like. It was picturesque and let all of us live in a little fantasy for a few days bbq'ing by the pool- surfing and well, just pure perfection ... until I heard someone say the word "jellyfish" I was in heaven. At that point it became one notch just below heaven- and I decided I would melt in the heat and die of dehydration before I entered an ocean that had one single floating jelly anything. I won't even eat PB& J now.

and don't forget the:
FANTAsY OF SHRIMP. I ate 394 shrimp. and that was before dinner.

Sivan was totally gorgeous-as usual- so all ten of us really didn't need to climb in the bathtub and do her hair- but we wanted her to not be bored on her wedding night and have to pick 30 bobby pins out later. The kids had the right idea- after baking in the sun on the bech for a bit during the ceremony- they decided to make sand pillows- and I am pretty sure the photographer didn't capture these impromptu unmissable shots. Everyone was jealous frankly- cause a good sand burying can do anyone some good.

I had only had about 3 tear jerker moments all week- and since you are SUPPOSE to cry at a wedding i think it was disguised well as tears of happiness...so the swolen eyes were acceptable that day. not sure what to do about tomorrow though.

Good for Sivan- she found it and married it. The last straight awesome guy who wants a house and family in San Francisco!